The longer I work in the field of healing the more I learn that it is through the acceptance of what is that we open up to the potential, to the possibility of all things. The ‘what is’, is reality. It’s only when we accept our reality, accept what is, that we surrender ourselves into new possibilities. By working with reality we are empowered to grow, we are empowered to make choices, and we are empowered to take responsibility for ourselves.
The people who will gain the most out of my book are those who want to deal with their reality and feel empowered to know that by facing and accepting their reality they are free. Free to make choices. Free to grow. And that freedom comes through taking responsibility for themselves and being accountable for those choices and their growth.
For example: in the injustice of deception I describe the Mistletoe People. The message in the description is – if you have a Mistletoe person in your life, what you will find is: if you don’t accept the reality of their personality then you will stay stuck trying to change them or fix them or make them different and you will be a victim to their control and manipulation. If you accept them for what they are and the way that they are, with no desire to change them and no desire to fix them but just accepting them as they are, then you are free. You are free to make choices. You can manage your time and your energy when you are around them. Even though they won’t be any different, it won’t have the same impact on you. By facing reality you become free.
Think of it like this – how many people do you know that move away from their families because they find them too stressful to only find the same personalities in their new community. The reality is they have to learn how to cope with those personalities or they keep on appearing in their lives. Or they move away and find peace but each time they return home they turn into the teenager or 6 year old that hasn’t resolved the issues from that time. They never get to cope with their families. They are stuck in that pattern and are a victim to their past.
When we face reality we become free. When we put things in a context, understand the dynamics of what makes a person the way they are, what our cultural, generational, societal, and gender beliefs and conditioning are, when we embrace and accept those realities, free of judgement, they no longer have a hold on us. They no longer control us. Once we are not controlled by the conditioning, the expectations, and the beliefs (the lessons of the injustice of limitations) that are held outside of us, by other people, then we become free. Free to choose to grow into whom we always were.
Our life experiences don’t make us who we are. Rather they get in the road of us staying connected to our inner truth, they cover us over. They block our connection to our self and we replace it by internalising what we are experiencing and believe other peoples beliefs about us. This is the lessons in the injustice of deception. When we decide we no longer want to be controlled by this process we start reading self-help books. We find an author, speaker, Guru or expert who says things we like and we take on their beliefs and try to fit ourselves into them. We do this because they offer a new state of perfection – one that feels better to us than the perfection presented by family or schools or friends that we feel we failed at. But it’s still someone else’s reality and no ours.
The reality within each chapter of injustice provides us with an opportunity to let go of other people’s beliefs, expectations and ultimately cultural, generational, gender and societal conditioning that doesn’t serve us or help us express the best we can be. Through understanding the underlying triggers, using techniques like Emotional Freedom Technique and taking remedies like Flower Essences we can peel away the layers of beliefs, expectations and conditioning to find our truth. As we do this, our lives begin to reflect who we are on the inside. We begin to manifest the life we want to live and concepts like the Law of Attraction start to work for us. But it first all stems from accepting reality.
I want people to find their truth. I want people to make sense of their own reality. I want them to make sense of what is insensible for them. That’s why I provide 20 Need-Fear Cycles descriptions and not five like it was suggested by the editor. Or I list six, seven or eight emotions or responses instead of three because despite the editor’s explanation being that people can work out the rest for themselves, it’s simply not true. If we all knew the answers to our lives we wouldn’t read the books we do. Not to mention of course that life doesn’t fit nicely into three experiences for the whole of humanity!
For some of us we will have to heal bucket loads of stuff to find our truth while others will take the smallest of steps and transform their lives. It’s not a competition. It is just what it is. The labelling of our reality is what makes us a victim to our circumstances. That’s not the kind of empowered realism I’m talking about. I’m talking about if something helps you, if it serves you and it takes you somewhere productive, positive, expansive, in the direction you want to go, brings out the best in you, helps your heart sing, then that’s what is good for you. It may not work for someone else and it might not apply to others but if it works for you, it is good for you. And if it creates harmony and peace in your world then awesome, you are on a winner. That’s what you should do.
How has accepting your reality empowered you to be all you can be?