In response, the human race has created rules, regulations, and standards, normalising, categorising and generalising everything about being a human being. Most of it controls and limits us, because it feels like it is used against us to make us feel rejected, not good enough, imperfect and a failure.
On a personal level we don’t really enjoy this reality. We feel hurt, damaged and traumatised by it. We may fight against it, rebel, or conform to it, all in an attempt to ease the pain. Yet, in our interactions with others, we will project out the rules, standards and regulations onto others. We will even justify and rationalise our intent to make us right in our choices and behaviours towards others.
This how being human becomes challenging. We don’t want the rules and regulations applied to us but we do want them applied to others. Too often, we replace one set of rules with another. We seek perfection through new beliefs and practices that we think we can succeed at. We surround ourselves with evidence of how this is true by attending courses, reading books and becoming part of a community of like-minded followers. We feel safe and secure in our new reality. That is until our bubble is burst and we discover the illusion of our fabricated existence.
Our physical experience gives us an opportunity to feel, sense, smell, see, touch, and hear life – human life, plant life, animal life, and the mineral life. It is a gift to observe all the complexities of life and on the flip side, is the challenge of pain, suffering, perception and interpretation, which can spin us into the rules and regulations of a man-made structured world.
Our needs underlie what we search for in events, what motivates us and what our intentions are when we engage with the outer world. But it is our fears that drive our reactions. Our fears personalise those needs and create the negative interpretation if our prized needs aren’t met fast enough or exactly how we expected them to be.
Understanding the Need-Fear Cycle empowers us to step out of this drama-fuelled hamster-wheel and take control of how our minds process our life. Understanding that it’s just our amygdala being triggered by the Need-Fear Cycle allows us to accept that it’s all just data; its information that we can utilise. Over the next few weeks I shall explore the 20 Need-Fear Cycles and how you can use them to free yourself from the drama they create.
How do you get trapped in the rules and regulations created by the collective human race?